When the joy of pregnancy is punctuated by uncertainty and discomfort, a loving partner can provide practical and emotional support, from doing chores to just plain listening. The more a man participates early on, the closer he will feel in years to come.
Spending time together for exercise and massage is particularly helpful. Exercise maintains well-being, alleviates stress and strain, and conditions your body for labour. A gentle massage makes it a shared pleasure. Try vitamin E oil on the abdomen it's soothing, and may minimise stretch marks.
Of the following routines, relaxing pelvic floor muscles to prevent tearing during childbirth is the most important. Making love also keeps you in touch with these muscles, and enhances pregnancy's sensual pleasures.
Pregnancy is divided into three "terms". Each places different physical and emotional demands on a woman.
Here's some help.
TERM ONE weeks 1-12
In early pregnancy, rest is important. So is freedom from emotional stress. Breathing exercises and massage relax, improve respiration, circulation and digestion, and relieve slight dizziness and nausea. 30 minutes (5-10 minutes breathing), 2 - 3 times a week.
Abdominal breathing.
Circulates a lot of oxygen for a little effort. Calms and relaxes.
First-term anatomy.
Little visible change.
Caution: Feeling dizzy?
Stop immediately and rest.
Feet, ankles and calves massage.
Improves circulation, prevents cramps, and feels very nice.
Head and neck massage.
Prevents and eases headaches, stiff neck and shoulders.
TERM TWO weeks 13-24
As the placenta produces hormones, self-confidence and health bloom. Swimming now promotes suppleness and flexibility. Add Upper abdominal breathing, pelvic floor exercises, and postural massage. One hour, 2 3 times a week.
Upper abdominal breathing.
A faster and higher rhythm, in through the nostrils, out through the mouth. Useful during labour. 5 minutes daily after abdominal breathing. Stop if dizzy.
Second-term anatomy. Expanding womb strains lower back and legs, and presses on stomach and intestines.
Thighs, buttocks & pelvic floor. Massage relieves weight-bearing muscles. Exercises relax main muscle groups of pelvic area, readying for birth.
TERM THREE weeks 25 - 40
Comfortable clothes, flat shoes, plenty of rest, and light frequent meals make life easier. Add the following massage and light breathing to involve all the muscles and joints engaged in childbirth. 2-3 times weekly, especially pelvic floor exercises before birth.
Third-term anatomy.
Top of womb presses on lungs. Baby's head engages in pelvic cavity at 36 weeks.
Light breathing.
Helps delay pushing out the baby before cervix is fully opened.
Spine, back & shoulders massage.
Maintains spinal integrity. Reduces tension in legs, chest, abdomen and pelvic floor.
Spine, back and shoulders
The body is as strong as the spine that supports it. If the lower back and shoulder muscles loses their strength, the forward pull of the expanding abdomen will move the body's centre of gravity. This puts extra strain on the postural muscles and, through them, on the pelvic floor. By maintaining the integrity of the spinal column, the following exercises in turn help the pelvic floor, chest and abdomen to remain relaxed.
Go down on all fours, then lower your weight forward with your buttocks raised, your forehead resting on the floor, and your arms extended straight forward. Relax, and breathe with your abdomen
Kneel in front of your partner. Using your whole hand, gently massage the sides of her arms and shoulders with smooth strokes
Stay in the same position
2 Place your hands at the base of her arms and gently massage the sides of her arms and chest.
Stay in the same position
Place your hands on each shoulder blade and, using a little body weight, push slowly and firmly back down the centre of her spine, then release. Repeat three or four times.
Sit on your feet with your kneees spread wide, and lean forward on to a pile of cushions. Relax and breathe with yor abdomen. Contract and relax your pelvic floor four or five times.
Using a little oil or powder, masage down each side of her spine with your fingertips.Work down to the buttocks three or four times.
Stay in the same position and contract and relax your pelvic floor four or five times.
Lean slowly forward as you massage smoothly but firmly around the two dimples at the base of her spine and around her buttocks.
Sit astide a chair and lean forward with a straight spine. Keeping your knees wide open and both feet pressed to the ground contract and relax your pelvic floor four or five times.
Using a little oil or powder, spread your hands and glide your thumbs up and down either side of her spine three or four times.
Baby's progress
1. Baby's head is in the birth canal. Descending, the head appears at the vaginal opening, stretching it.
2. The head squeezes through. It rotates immediately, so the body can turn for birth.
3. A single contraction and the shoulders slide through, followed by the body.
SOLO STRETCHING - Terms Two & Three
In childbirth, the abdominal and pelvic muscles and pelvic joints undergo extreme expansion and contraction. This sequence strengthens and centres you. Massage the area you're exercising. After each exercise, relax and take 4-5 abdominal breaths. One hour, 2-3 times a week.
SYMPHYSIS PUBIS DYSFUNCTION
During pregnancy hormones increase the suppleness of the soft tisssues and there is more flexibility in the joints to allow the baby an easier passage through the birth canal. Sometimes the increased flexibility of the pubic joint in front of the pelvis causes pain. This can range from mild to severe and is felt around the front of the pubic bone and increases when you walk, open your legs or lift your legs. This may also be accompanied by pain in the lumbar spine, sacro iliac joints around the lower back, in the groin and the inner thighs.
Treatment specialists
Physiotherapy, Osteopathy and Massage can all bring relief and it could be useful to obtain a support belt for daytime use and a tubigrip bandage for night from a specialist at your local surgery/clinic/hospital.
Whether you intend to breastfeed or not, simple breast care during pregnancy increases comfort and confidence. Wear a well-fitting bra that doesn't flatten the nipples. If you wish, include gentle oral stimulation in your lovemaking.
BREAST CARE Preparing for breastfeeding
Washing your breasts.
A daily warm water splash improves circulation and encourages after-birth milk flow.
Soothing sore nipples. Gently massage lanolin around the nipple and areola.
Self help
Warm baths, well cushioned flat shoes and keep your knees together and avoid exercises like squatting and tailor pose. Discuss birth positions with your midwife and/or attendant and you could consider a birth pool or lying on your side or on all fours. If you can, avoid lifting and carrying, rest as much as you can and when resting place a pillow to support your top leg, when laying on your side
Correcting inverted nipples. With index fingers, stretch the aerola sideways, then vertically, then all around (clockwise direction).
Expressing milk.
Make a "V" with thumb a.nd index finger on both sides of your breast. In one movement, draw hands down so index fingers cup the base. Gently squeeze the areola until a drop of milk emerges
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